Chul-soo is officially d.e.a.d

I'm posting to make myself clear...
kinda like a reminder to myself
so that I won't fall again.

I tried to throw him away...
for several times
especially when he's gone
yet he keep coming back
again and again

When I finally was over him...
there he comes again
make me wonder
making phone calls for hours...
sending sweet texts
then disappear the next day.

I'm the one at fault.
I'm the one to be blame...
I misunderstood the signal...
I let my mind "poisoned"
I let myself posessed.

So this is it.
I won't let ,myself fall any deeper.
So what if I break down?
There goes Chul-soo
There goes Su-jin
Will only remain in "A Moment To Remember"

How foolish of me, kan???
I thought there was "something"
I thought he was "someone"
But I was just a "nobody" to him
And he already got "somebody"
How foolish of me!

Somehow I'm glad.
Glad that I won't have to worry about the love triangle
Glad that I won't have to think about sacrificing
Glad that I won't betray my friendship with "her"
Since we're not attached to each other
Neither her nor me we're not
And the love triangle never "existed"
And I'm glad!

Maybe once upon the time
there were moments that we cherished together
there were feeling that we shared with each other
the companion he was when i really needed one

It was then...
but now...
I need to let go
He need to let me go...
and I'm letting go.

So the "chul-soo" things..
E.n.d  h.e.r.e.
.

He who makes me puzzled

He...

Somehow I got clueless, but sometimes theres a lot about him that I want to tell.

He...

Who's got me puzzled all these years.

I don't even know where to begin.

Now I found myself speechless.

He is the reason why I so hate charming guys.

He was so damn charming that he could make girls fall over heels on him.

I mean, seriously... and I am no exception.

I could say that I had fall a little bit for him. Crush I supposed. Just a little..

Well who could blame me?

I couldn't resist. The charms, the sweet-talks, the intelligence. And the thoughtfulness! Damn it!

He..

I could say, I could slightly remember, that when I recite the poem, he was the only one who listen. He was the only one who sort of pay real attention to me. The way he looks at me kinda give me the feeling... like I was appreciated.

When the other guy jokingly said I was beautiful, he immediately agreed. As in to save me from being humiliated. He somehow made my day.

When I broke my brooch, and I really need to wear it, in the dark, near the beach, he voluntarily tried to really fix it. And yes, He did. He did fix the brooch. He fix it as I was someone special to him. He fix it like he cared. Such small things, and how he even care for the small details... I feel like he's my saviour... at that time.

See? How could I not fall for that? He's intelligent and yet he fix things.

He even miscalled when I was sad. I can still recall hiding from him in that van, so he won't see my sad-sulking face.

I can say, he makes me feel like a woman ♥

Yeah, but he's arrogant yet he stay humble in a way that most people won't. [???]

Sometimes, I tell myself that maybe the kindness, and the thoughtfulness was just in his nature. That's him. The good guy, the sweet talker, the prince charming... that's just him...naturally.

Yet, I still think he let his cell in front of me on purpose that night. Yes.

That night when we was coming back from that vacation, I was sitting right behind him.

The bus was going to his place first, but right before arriving, I can clearly tell that he was making a call.

So, him leaving his cell doesn't make sense, isn't it?

So we left him, and went to our place. I switch my sit, so I could have a bigger space to sleep, and suddenly, I heard the ringtone. The ringtone coming from his cell. But then, I no longer sat there so it wasn't me who picked up.

I can still clearly heard like the way she answer the phone was like he was questioning her, why was she the one who picked up. And she was like need to explain why she was there and ... So it ended by him asking her to give it to some other guy friend.

It still keeps me wondering though, up till today.

Does he really left it on purpose, so I'd picked up???

♫  Oh, look what you've done

You've made a fool of everyone
Oh well, it seems like such fun

Until you lose what you had won ♫

He and I... we still got "unfinished business" between us.

But I don't know if I even want to see him.

I don't know.

I really don't.